smile people. this is the season where smiles are rare to come by and wrinkles and dead brain cells are in abundance. yes, finals is right around that horrible corner that i wish i am never going to have to go around. too bad i can't control time, too too bad that i will never be able to. sob.

i guess it's time for me to go all "philosophical" again. it's a wonder how my brain comes up with this stuff. i should be running out of things to dwell upon soon. it's only natural. well, at least i know some people read this and hey it's good enough that i got my recognition and sense of achievement.

anyone watched "lost in translation"? my boyfriend thinks it's most probably the best movie there is. well, me, i hate endings like that, sad hanging endings that i am not satisfied with. it's bad enough that in real life we hardly ever get nice fairy-tale happy endings anymore, the least the movies can do is to leave a smile on our faces at the end while giving us a thin string of hope that things like that are not lost to us. please don't argue that sad hanging endings can also leave smiles on faces =)

this lead me to think about why happy endings are so rare. even if there was a happy ending (whenever an ending is, when is an ending? at death? it definitely wouldn't be a happy ending when two people part, would it?), the journey to the said happy ending would also be filled with the occasional scars and pitfalls. i guess that's life. it's only fair that everyone gets their fair share of ups and downs. i hate it though.

call me naive (and i might just readily agree) but i have always put marriage on the pedestal. marriage should be beautiful and full of butterflies and honey and everything nice right? wrong apparently. you watch movies and they tell you how a couple on cloud nine will fall out of the relationship 10, 20 and if they are incredibly lucky 30 years down the road. apparently the more time you spend with someone, even with love that can conquer the universe (so to speak), you will eventually get sick of one another and fall out of love. at that point of time, all that is left is a sense of responsibility to their children and a legal vow made to the marriage certificate. the situation is so tragic that life in itself has lost its meaning. i wonder if it is because people change with time or that it wasn't meant to be, that we humans are ultimately meant to spend our lives alone exactly like how we came to this world. i do not like the thought of any of those. whatever it is, i still believe that doesn't mean that it would happen to two-thirds of the world it will happen to me and the people around me =) frown all you want, raise your eyebrows but i refuse to be pessimistic =)